Episode 84, 47 min listen
Sometimes it takes someone new, coming from outside the community, to hold a mirror up, allowing us to see our community more honestly and realistically. In this episode, we will meet Chong Song, who came to the U.S. to marry a soldier. Following her husband’s military career, she has lived in many places across our country and beyond. In this episode, Chong shares a little of her life story, including her immigration journey, as well as her honest and direct take on Greenville.
Welcome to this very special series, New Roots, New Voices: Listening to Our Immigrant Neighbors, where we will listen to and lift up the voices and stories of local immigrants here in Greenville, South Carolina.
AUDIO PLAYER
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ADDITIONAL REFERENCES
Learn more about Tabernacle Baptist College.
This immigration series is done in partnership and collaboration with:
- Village Engage
- Greenville Immigration and Faith Coalition
FULL TRANSCRIPT
-Introduction
Ame Sanders 00:11
This is the State of Inclusion Podcast, and I'm Ame Sanders. There is a lot in the news every day about immigrants, and a lot of it is negative. What if we went beyond the news? What if we opened our hearts and our minds to better understand the reality of immigrants in our own community?
Over the next several weeks, we will listen to and lift up the voices and stories of local immigrants here in Greenville, South Carolina. Along the way, we will meet neighbors, families, friends, local icons and legends. We will come to understand some of the challenges our immigrant neighbors face and how we can become better allies.
Welcome to this very special series, New Roots, New Voices: Listening to Our iImmigrant Neighbors.
Sometimes it takes someone new, coming from outside the community, to hold a mirror up, allowing us to see our community more honestly and realistically. In this episode, we will meet Chong Song, who came to the U.S. to marry a soldier. Following her husband’s military career, she has lived in many places across our country and beyond. In this episode, Chong shares a little of her life story, including her immigration journey, as well as her honest and direct take on Greenville.
And we're happy today to welcome Chong Song. Chong, tell me a little bit about yourself, about who you are.
Chong Song 01:45
So actually, I born in South Korea, in Seoul. I came to United States in America in 1991, Alaska.
Ame Sanders 01:55
That's where you arrived. Was in Alaska.
Chong Song 01:57
That's Alaska, October 3, 1991. October 3, I came to the Alaska.
Ame Sanders 02:01
So what brought you to Alaska?
Chong Song 02:03
So I met my husband in South Korea. He was stationed at the Camp Humphrey. So I actually worked on post. So I met him there, and then he left, and he sent me a fiancée visa. So I came to there to marry him.
Ame Sanders
So you came as a fiancée. Were you guys married in Alaska?
Chong Song
Yes, so I got there October 3, but we married November 1, because with Fiancée Visa, to only stay the three months. You are allowed to stay all of the three months after that, if you're not married, you have to leave.
Ame Sanders
So, you came as young woman to get married.
Chong Song
Yeah, around the thirty, a little after thirty. It's not really young, young, but yes, thirty.
-Early Life In South Korea
Ame Sanders 03:01
Could you tell me a little bit about your Korean roots?
Chong Song
I was born in Seoul, grew up in Seoul. So I went to school, of course, in Seoul, but my final education was high school because my mom believed woman doesn't need to get educated, because she says, like, high school diploma is way plenty enough, so she wanted me to get married. So she put the matchmaker.
Ame Sanders
Matchmaker? So she put a matchmaker to help you to get married, to find a husband?
Chong Song
Yes, because there's a lot of time during that time as lot of the marriage that way, if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend, but during the time, it's not like this. A lot of times the marriage is like a matchmaker. So my mom wanted me to get married, so, but actually I didn't really want to get married, because I just wanted my life. I told you, I don't want to be a slave to the man. That's the oriental custom. Usually woman serve to the men. I saw my mom did to always, you know, serve to my daddy. I know it's kind of…I know she loves to my daddy. But sometimes it's like, I feel like it's not the right way. We are the right equal human beings.
Ame Sanders
So it wasn’t right for you?
Chong Song 04:45
No, and then it's Korean culture is lot of culture is not good for…I thought it's not good for the woman. They just treat the man better than woman. That's why my mom, my mom, sent my brother in college, but though she doesn't want me to go college, because the woman doesn't need to get much educated. So she wanted to get married, settle down, have kids, just like she did it. But I didn't want to go the route I wanted just to to see the world and then to different life. I don't want to really get married anyway. My philosophy, I always say, if I love somebody, I will get married. That's my first choice. My second choice, somebody, rich man. Rich Man who can give me give me money so I can see the world. So my second choice. So I don't want to really somebody put the matchmaker and then stranger man to marry they have children. That's so gross.
Ame Sanders 05:36
So she brought the matchmaker in. But I remember you telling me that you did some things to make that not work out.
Chong Song
Yeah. So matchmaker, and put the, you know, there's the family involved. His family, of course, my family, especially mom, of course, his mom. So usually they introduce us, and then, like, blah, blah, blah, they say asking to, you know, your age, like they will cause see me first. Who am I? So, and then they wanna, maybe hour later they just leave us alone. And then to whatever you guys go for. Usually just go to see the movie, and then dinner, if you goes good. So I usually tell the man HEY. I don't want to get married, so don't waste your time. So we don't need to go to theater or have a dinner together. I don't want to do that, so, but if you want me to do it, I will do it, but because that time usually, man paid everything, so, but I don't want you wasting your money. But if you want me to I definitely, you know, I go for it. But so this, I told him, so first thing I give you a choice. You say, No, she's not the kind of woman I look. If you're not, I'm just go straight to my mom. No, he's not the good guy.
Ame Sanders
So you didn't go forward with the matchmaker, but you told me also that, and you just said that you were interested in seeing the world. So you had a different idea of what you might want to do.
Chong Song
Yeah, so I want to be a teacher. Usually, teacher have the break time in the spring. We have a two break in the winter, so I need to make money, so I can have those monies, and then I can see the world. That's my goal. So either I like, I I still like, but I love the kids, so I say, Okay, I'm gonna be a school teacher or to do that kind. So, but of course, be a teacher, you have to get the college degree. So I didn't go college, so I couldn't be in South Korea during the like 70s, 80s, you we don't have a much scholarship program in the College. Basically, your parents can offer to send you to college, then you go, if not, you are it. So I was kind of smart student, but it's not like a scholarship, way high, no. So, but so that's why I didn't go to college. Usually the ladies in Korean culture, another one, they don't move out until when they married, then they moved out.
Ame Sanders 08:22
So, they live with their parents until they marry?
Chong Song
Yes. So I could stay home with my parents to when I get married, and then I can move out. So I don't have to worry about living, right? So? And then one thing I told my parents, I told my mom, since you not let me to live my life, to you not support to me, to send me to college. And I told you, I'm not gonna get married, so you gotta support me until you die, I'm gonna stay home. I don't know what's gonna be in my life. I really don't know what is the…what I wanted to do. So. And then after 25 there's not many matchmaker brought the guys so. And then one day, my sister asked me, So what are you gonna do? The Mom and Daddy gonna be someday die after they of course, you're gonna get older too. So what are you gonna do? And then I said, Well, I thought about it time to time, but I didn't think about that. So then I see, okay, then I will do to get to do something. Then I I love travel, so I say, Okay, I'm gonna get guide. But if I need to see the world, I need to be English tour guide.
These days change that they learn English, I think is the elementary school, third grade. But when I in the school days we are at junior high school, we learn English. But I hate it, though they have in South Korea, everybody wants to learn to speak English. So you can find a place so easy. So, so I went there to learning conversation first. So I learned that one, and then I realized I need a grammar too. So okay, I did both. So I just studied, like year to speak English, and then, so be ready for the tour guide. So during the time, a year later, and one of my friend asked me to, oh, there's the one Korean boss, he had the shop in Humphrey, and, of course, Osan Air Force Base. He had a two different shop in there. So they're looking for somebody working in the custom made shoes shop.
Ame Sanders
So and that would help you practice your English,
Chong Song
Yes. So my goal was maybe I maybe year, then year I maybe work there to, you know, that's why I say, Okay. I will do it. And of course, another reason I say yes, because Humphrey is in Pyeongtaek, is kind of two hours away from my home in Seoul. So I want to kind of get out of the comfort zone and out of my like from my parents.
Ame Sanders
So you moved out of the house to go take this job?
-Religious Background
Chong Song 11:44
Yes. so I got a little room. So the first time in my life I live by myself. So it was kind of kind of strange, but I liked it. And then also that time I went to church. I grew up in a Buddhist family. My parents, they are Buddhist. My daddy birthday, we always go temple celebrate his birthday. My mom birthday, we went to temple celebration. So we are really close to Temple. And of course, when I stay home, my mom, when you go temple, she always asked me, Hey, let's go. So I said, why not? Because I love a mountain. I love the food. So I always went to the temple, you know. Like my mom bowed down to the Buddha, and then I follow her. And then time to time, I said, Why? Why I bow down to those gold thing,. Yeah, golden statue. They call Buddha.
But anyway, I didn't much think about it, but I went to Christian junior high school. I went to Christian school every morning, 10 minutes, we go to little chapel, and then we learning the Bible. So three years I learned Bible with Chapel everything, so I know all. And then I went to church too, so, but I didn't go after school, then I didn't do anything. But after I went to Pyeongtaek by myself, that time is like I was tutoring two boys. I working in there, but also so funny, but I love teaching kids, so I met this lady church. She should go to church too. And then she said, like, Hey, could you teach my boy? He was Elementary School, third grade, could you teach them to the mathematic so I said, why? Sure, I have a time. So I did that. And then then she took care of me during that I was stay there, because I don't want to really cook, so I just a lot of time, just, you know, sometimes skip it, sometime I just go there, you know, the market. I just go get a little food there. But she always invited me, hey. She called me Seonsaengnim. Seonsaengnim mean teacher. Seonsaengnim come after walk down, just come my house, eat the dinner. So I always call her. She's really good cook.
Ame Sanders
So she was your...she and her children were your second family. So they adopted you,
Chong Song 14:35
Yeah. She asked me one day, hey, Seonsaengnim, if you want to go church, what you do Sunday? So I say, why not? Okay, I'll go. But that day, she said, Come to church. So I Sure. Then after, of course, I want a good lunch. So I went there. During that time by myself, I thought about my life just little opened my eyes. I always boundary with my parents. I'm the youngest one. I only have one sister. She's moved out too. But I always thought about what is like a life, is to but during the time when I by myself, I more thought about to life, and then I learning to, oh, this world so wicked. I cannot live by myself. Woman live by herself is very dangerous. So I kind of little bit opened my eyes. And then I said during the time, as I said, I didn't want to get married, but I think I need some kind of boundary to protection, because I know my mom and daddy is not going to be there forever, so but the lot of things going on my mind, and then I went to church, and then I just still so comfortable. Just how can I just cannot explain. I cannot explain. But I was sitting there like welcoming. Just, I just sat there crying.
Ame Sanders 15:59
You felt welcomed and blessed and happy to be there.
Chong Song 16:05
I sat there crying. The boy's mom was so shocked. And then…
Ame Sanders 16:09
I can see it must have been an important moment for you, because even talking about it is an emotional moment for you. So it must have been a very special experience to be there in the church with her.
Chong Song 16:27
Yes, but I didn't realize, but I thought it's like during the time to when I to during the time is it God is protecting me.
Ame Sanders 16:31
That God was protecting you? So your fears that you needed someone to help protect you, that answered those prayers for you.
So you moved from being a Buddhist, but not really committed to being a Buddhist. Just sort of following your parents, your family, and you were baptized in the church Yes. And found your church family and your good friend there, yes. And then, I guess as well, while you were working at the shoe tailor shop, you found your husband, yes, perhaps.
Chong Song
So looking back that time, I think it's God is blessing me and protecting me. Like just everything is to, like, kind of more clear, and then more like to, but I, I feel so peace. And then I was a baby Christian. I just, I so happy. I just, I was so happy.
Ame Sanders 17:23
So you moved from Korea to Alaska. You married a soldier. Yes, you guys have moved around a bit. You must have a lot of thoughts about what home means to you. How do you think about home today?
-About Home
Chong Song 17:28
So home before, of course, when I grew up, I always stay around my parents. I thought I'm gonna stay there forever with my parents, I'm the youngest one. Also always that, you know, I'm the baby, so they treat like a baby, even my sister, my brother. I have one brother, one sister. So my brother is way older than us, but my sister, she's two years older than me, but she always treat me like a little baby girl sister. So I'm always surrounded by family. So and then I went to Pyeongtaek to live by myself a little bit that time opened my eyes. After that, I moved to the Alaska and then home. When I met Jesus. So I know that is my home. Someday I'm going to go heaven. So when I left to to my parents, I already to practice a year by myself, a little bit over year by myself to live. So when I left my country, my parents, oh, there was kind of missed, but I wasn't missed that much because I was so thrilled to just see to that time fiancée. I was so thrilled. So home…still South Korea is my home country. I never thought about the US as my home. I'm still Korean. So South Korea is my home country. But think about to but no longer my parents is not there. No longer. My parents passed away. I only have my brothers passed away. We have, like small family. My only my have a sister is back home. But since after my parents gone, even though my sister there, since we are, how many, 30, almost 34, years. So it's kind of feel no more to that's not I missed the home. It's I don't think so. I don't feel that way. No more.
-A Christian Witness
Ame Sanders 20:00
So you don't…So you still think of Korea, South Korea, as your home country, yes, but you don't miss it as you would home any longer. But you, what I think I heard you say, is because of your faith, you think about heaven, yes, nowadays as your home.
Chong Song
Yes, yes. And then, even though my parents was Buddhist, after I saved, and then I started to pray for my parents, because I don't want to go to heaven by myself, of course. And then I didn't realize my husband wasn't saved either. I thought it's all American people. They are Christian, because who sent it to missionary to Korea? This so I was very Christian. I never asked my husband, are you saved? Are you Christian? I didn't ask him to about that. But later on, when I saved, I came to to Alaska. I never miss Sunday. I go church all the time. My husband that time I didn't have driver license, nothing. We live in Mountain, top of the mountain in Alaska, nobody dared to come pick me up, because the snow cover up. My husband always take me for church. He knew I never to. He knew it mattered to you. Oh, yeah. Going to church is the big matter in my life. So even he dare not thinking to not take me to church. So I always go to church so and then I started praying for my husband, salvation. And then I started my parents salvation. So when they passed away, they were Christian,
Ame Sanders
So you helped to bring both your husband and your parents, yeah, to Christianity with you.
Chong Song
First, my husband first, yeah. Little after later, when we marry in Alaska, then he saved. And then to and then we witnessed to his sister. And his sister all saved. His family, her family, her husband, children, and then to my in law both saved. My in law both passed away, but they were Christian. They saved Christians. So my sister in law, from time to time, she said, like, what are so funny? Like, we never thought about the little Korean girl came to US and then witness us, we are saved. So that was really, so...So I said, Well, I didn't, I didn't know, what's the God's planning? Why? Sometime, why I'm here? Of course, during the time beginning of like, my husband wasn't Christian. I was born against, save Christian. When I go to church, he did a lot of time to, you know, sometimes happy, probably sometimes not happy. Little bit later, he was kind of, hey, why don't you just stay home today? Like, I said, Oh no. And especially like the kids come and I said, No, no, I'm gonna go church. So time to time, he just bugging me, bothering me. And then one day I told, Hey, let's sit down. If you don't want me to go church, you don't like it, then I'm gonna go Korea. Yeah. So either you gotta choose, either let me go to church or just divorce me and then I'm just gonna go back to Korea. So don't ask me again to not to go to church. That is not an option in my life. So without you, yeah, it's hard to live. But without God, I cannot live. So you cannot make me stop,
Ame Sanders 23:49
Wow. And so he understood the meaning for you. You're a woman with a really strong spirit, obviously. You had your own idea for your plan as you grew up, and that you wanted to not become a servant to a man, that you wanted to find your own way in the world, then you found the person that you wanted to share your life with, but you also found your spiritual life as well. And so those are all important things. Yeah, how many children do you have?
Chong Song
Two, first a girl and then second is a boy. So I have both of them in Alaska.
-Coming to Greenville and Bible College
Ame Sanders 24:15
So you now have a daughter and a son. Both of them were born in the United States, in Alaska. So maybe you can tell me a little bit about how you found your way to Greenville, and then maybe tell me a little bit about how you find Greenville.
Chong Song
So after retire, and then my husband said, hey, the God calling, God told my heart Is he want me to go Bible college. So I said, Oh no. Actually, I was, I was really not happy about it. I was tired. 23 years here, there so and then now my husband say, Hey, honey, I need to go Bible College. I said, Oh, no,
Ame Sanders 25:08
Yeah, but you, of all people, at that point would understand when God calls you to do something.
Chong Song
I know you could joke exactly, I know. But one side is I was kind of happy about one side, and I want to settle down. And then he said, so I want to be a missionary. Missionary to I said, missionary. So we have to moving around again. So I said, Okay, so then we're gonna go, we are Independent Baptist church people. We are Independent Baptists, so we go to a close church there during the time, we heard about the Tabernacle Baptist College. Tabernacle Baptist College, somebody say, oh, there's a good, good Bible College. There's nighttime. So during the day you can work, and then nighttime. This is a missionary and only pastor. It's not like a four-year college. They just this is the missionary pastor, college itself. We knew this is there, so we came down check it out. Greenville, the Tabernacle Baptist School and the Baptist College. We check it out. So 2009 August 1, first of August, that's we have a camper. We moved down to the Tabernacle Baptist Church. So we came down there. So school start, I think college, they started, like 15th or 16th, so, but we didn't have a house, but we're living in the camper there. Good thing is a church have a parking lot, have a camping spot. So we, there's the front of the girls dome. There's a spot. So we live parking there, live there, and then we're gonna live in them. Pastor says, oh, there's a housing allowance to college student.
Ame Sanders 27:15
So you brought your camper, you parked in the parking lot of the church and outside the dorm, and then you moved into their housing.
Chong Song
And then one thing we find that the wife is free. So why not? So I always want to go college. And then after I born again to saved person, I always want to go Bible College. Oh, why not? I'm gonna go with you. So I went to college with my husband. So, but the woman, usually wife, they to come the usually wife, go to the be a teacher, kindergarten teacher. But I told my pastor, I cannot torture all the kids because my pronunciation, they're not gonna like it. So please to talk to my pastor first, and my dean. Don't worry, I'm not gonna be a pastor, so let me just have a theology degree because I'm not gonna be a teacher. So my pastor is allowed to me have a theology degree. So I have a theology degree, just like my husband. Because I didn't want to have a teacher degree. So I have a theology so everybody in the man, those men, they have a theology degree. So can be a pastor or be a missionary. So yes, I am. So if I want to be a pastor, I can go maybe some Korean church, but I know I better not. I already told my pastor I would never want to do it. But Independence Baptist church, they they're not allowed to any woman to be a pastor than any woman to be in the position in the church. A woman can be a Sunday school teacher.
Ame Sanders 28:56
But not a leadership position in the church.
Chong Song
That's the Bible. I believe a Bible there shouldn't be there's no woman preacher. That's what I believe.
-Impressions of Greenville
Chong Song 29:07
So anyway, so that's why I came down 2009 to drove to the camper with my husband truck. So we came down, coming down from the Whitehorse Road, coming down 26 in Hendersonville coming down, I saw some fruit stand. So I stopped by fruit stand. I saw sign, the blueberry. Some fruit. So I asked them, the guy and so, so I like to have a blueberry. He doesn't know what I say. It just look like what I said, blueberry. How much the blueberry he said? So I thought he’s joking with me. So I said pointing out a blueberry…do you want me to write down.
Ame Sanders 29:52
So he had trouble with your accent,
Chong Song
Yes. And also, I had trouble with his accent too. I didn't recognize his southern accent. Southern accent is the different so that's been hard for you in Greenville. That's first my experience, very first experience. Yeah. So oh, the people cannot understand me, and then I cannot. His accent is a little bit different. I heard about it before, but my first experience, he couldn't understand me. I couldn't understand so we kind of so I can do but in the past, church and then later, like to I love somebody approach my husband and then tell my husband, oh, we are not appreciate your marriage. You married to Korean woman the different different culture and races,.Oh, different races? Yes, so we are not too happy about one. One guy talked to. My husband is very direct. He's not beat around the bush. Very direct. So, he said, So you want me to divorce her? Later on, he told me about and then in, in all the church the we have a lot of like a Black boy to Black boy, the teen group have a Black boy like some different group. So all the kids like hugging each other. Hey, hi, how are you hugging each other? My daughter was one time. Is the the Bob Jones student coming to our church. Bob Jones student, the one the Black boy, came to our church. So my daughter and they are like, after, like, Oh, they're like, hey, and then hugging each other. Somebody, so they want to approach my husband to, we don't like to your daughter to hugging to the Black boy. Somebody wants to approach my husband, too, we don't like our daughter hugging the
Ame Sanders
So here in Greenville?
Chong Song
Oh yeah, I say, I say, what? Then they say we are in the Bible Belt, especially we are in the Buckle of the Bible Belt. And then they say we are not allowed hugging the Black boy, you are not allowed to the Korean girl, you are not..That is ridiculous. That is ridiculous. I never heard of. And then I look around the all church congregation, there's no Black.
Ame Sanders
So do you feel like that's changed at all in Greenville over the years?
Chong Song
So that's why my kids, they didn't like it. My daughter always say, I hate Greenville. They didn’t like it. And then I said this, that is so sad, where they say we are in the Bible Belt, and we are probably a Buckle of the Bible Belt, and then they say we cannot hug any Black boy cannot hug any Black people, you are not the church. Black kids cannot allow to come to the church. What kind of…and then you cannot marry another race. There is a that is like, I don't understand. That is not right. This is not right, I says. And then I look around. There's our church. I'm the only Korean, I'm the only Asian, I'm only one with the different skin color. I didn't realize before, but all because there's a lot of nice people. There's a lot of nice people. Of course, my pastor and wife, they are so, so nice. They are like, I felt like first week, and she say, Hey, Chong, we have every week I invite a dozen people in my house every Sunday. Could you come to eat with us? So she invited us to their dinner. So there's one church lady. She's like mother to me. She's this lady. She graduated from Furman University in 1964. Wow. The lady is so sweet to me. She's like my mother.
Ame Sanders
Yeah, so, so I think what I hear you saying is that there are some very good and generous and welcoming people in Greenville. Yeah. But there is, you've also experienced an undercurrent, or a set of experiences that really focused on race and how it didn't we, we didn't include everyone.
Chong Song
They are not welcoming. And then it's like, I said, really, like, wow. And then I say, wow.
Ame Sanders
And this was in the church where you would expect them, yes, to be the most welcoming and loving.
Chong Song
It opened my eyes, and also..really? And then I say, like to because we are kind of bouncing around to like to base, so there they don't care. I live in North Carolina two years, right? When you go to North Carolina, there's all different kind of people, so they don't care who you are. But North Carolina, South Carolina, so, and then even Maine, and then to Rhode Island.
Ame Sanders 35:10
But South Carolina was different. And Greenville, Greenville, specifically, in South Carolina.
So I am sorry that you've experienced that and that you've had to struggle with that, and it sounds like Greenville has a way to go, oh yes, to become more welcoming of people who maybe don't look like you or come from the same place that you do, or maybe have the same accent, Southern or Korean or whatever it happens to be. So it sounds like we have a ways to go with that.
Chong Song
I think so, after pandemic, and then a lot of people moved into Greenville area. Well. Might be more like a changing it, but I think still, but...
Ame Sanders 36:03
So this isn't in the past. This is current. This is now.
Chong Song
For me, 2009 through the old while I've been through. So I say, but might be changing it, but I say, like, Oh, I've been to bouncing around the different state, of course, to my you know, Wisconsin. So I do Wisconsin, I do Canada. And then when I left to Alaska, all the way down here, we drove down to Colorado, state. You've been a lot of places. Oh yes, I've been a lot of different place,
Ame Sanders
And Greenville is definitely not the most welcoming.
Chong Song
The 50 state I've been through this year. Last Hawaii was my last state.
Ame Sanders
So you've been to all 50 states. So you've met your dream of traveling.
Chong Song 36:56
Yes, so, but it's like a Greenville first year, like, we've been here. So that's why, especially my kids, they didn't have good memory.
They didn't have an easy time.
No, my daughter always, I hate Greenville. I hate Greenville. But guess what? Now, she stuck. She's stuck. And we stuck. And then I said, my son moved down here because he want nearby to us. So he was in Wisconsin. He loved Wisconsin, but he moved down here couple years ago. So we all are family.
I didn't buy house until to two years, because I didn't want to settle down here, to stay here. I told you about to my husband, want to be go to the mission field. But during the junior year, my husband had went down. He was really, really sick. He's in and out the hospital all the time. So he was really, he had a big health problem. My husband had problem. Cannot go to the mission field. He needed nearby the veteran hospital. So every eight months he had the treatment. So, so our dream, it was my husband. Our dream was kind of empty. So time to time, I said, God, I don't know why, you never let us go to the mission field, but why you want us to come down here to Greenville? And then one year, I was crying a lot of times. We just, you know, a lot of my kids and I was a teenager, my daughter went to have to go college. So time to time, I asking to God, God, why? What's your planning? Even though I couldn't go to the mission field, and then, and then later. So my daughter went to went to the Furman University, and then she graduated there, and then she met the guy to here to have to the business down here. So now she's stuck. Now she's changing a lot of open her mind, but, but time to time, that's my son is another, he still say that you guys passed away. I am not gonna stay here. I'm gonna go back to Wisconsin,
Ame Sanders
But God has a plan for you. He just hasn't told you yet what it is.
-Hospital Interpreter
Chong Song 39:20
No So, but the funny about it? One day in the hospital, I went to appointment something. One guy talked to me, so you are Korean? I said, Yes. He said, Oh, we need to Korean interpreter. I say, What do you mean? Korean interpreter? Then I working in the hospital. He's with Vietnamese so, so I need a Korean interpreter. I said, what is the what is the interpreter? And they say, oh, we need to patient. Some patient cannot speak English. So I need to somebody can speak English, also Korean. So this, I did it. 2012 I start to working in the hospital. Before the pandemic, actually, oh, I was the interpreter, Korean medical interpreter. So I don't know how I did it, but I know one thing every time I go there, I study, and then I pray, Lord, you know my limit, right? So you have to help me.
Ame Sanders 40:32
I'm going to circle back to where we started with this discussion, and then we probably need to wrap this up. But you said you wanted, when you were a young woman, you wanted to see the world and to travel, and you have obviously done that. You brought your faith to the US, and you shared it and witnessed to others and touched other people who were around you, and connected to those people. And you wanted to be able to teach, and you taught your children and homeschooled them, and also tutored other children along the way. And then you also wanted to learn English so that you could be a tour guide. Maybe you didn't realize touring the hospital would be the way it would happen, but it is interesting that what you describe as the things you wished when you were a young woman, all of those things have in some way come true for you. I'm sorry that Greenville has not been a welcoming place for you and your family, but I am confident that you have made your mark in Greenville to make it a better place. I have one last question for you, though you told me that you have something you love doing now that we haven't talked about and that you do almost every morning. Would you talk about that for just a minute before we wrap up?
-Pickleball
Chong Song 41:52
I play pickleball every morning,
Ame Sanders
But you play every day. I play every day.
Chong Song
I play every day. And then to meeting the lot of new people to play pickleball. Everybody say that you are always so smile. You are always so, like, so excited about it. I say, why not? Why not happy? Because, first of all, you are healthy to come out here play. You can be in hospital, right? And also, you don't have to go to make money. A lot of people right now working there somewhere and making money. But you have time. You don't have to work. You just come out here play pickleball, right? So I think you see, we should be happy about that one. So you're healthy. Can play pickleball. And then yes, sometimes I always say, like today, who's who is my eagle wing?
Your eagle wing, yeah.
Ame Sanders
So what do you mean by eagle wing?
Chong Song
What is the eagle wing in the Bible? I told you about eagle wing. We are under the protection of God. He is protecting us under the eagle wing. And then I say, You're my eagle wing. I'm under your wing.
So you carry me, right? I told them, so you carry me today, right? I say, so I can play easy, so. And then also, people say, Oh, I know you.
-Conclusion
Ame Sanders 43:26
Chong, I want to thank you so much for talking with me today and sharing your story and a little bit about growing up and your life as you've experienced the US. Thank you so much.
Chong Song
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much.
Ame Sanders
This interview represents only a portion of my conversations with Chong. In meeting her, I was taken with her lighthearted and cheerful disposition and positive outlook. She smiled so easily and laughed often. But she also teared up several times when discussing moments in her life that held special significance for her.
As is sometimes the case, some of the wisdom from an interview comes when the mics are off.
During the interview, Chong did not hesitate to tell me that she did not find Greenville a welcoming and inclusive community. And she did not really want to remain here. She is held here now because of family ties. She even described it as stuck. She didn’t hold back when she expressed her shock and disappointment at the racist and bigoted behavior that she witnessed and experienced in our community and in the church. I included some of the examples she shared in this episode, but there were others as well. When I listen to Chong, it is clear that Greenville still has a long way to go to become more welcoming and inclusive.
After we turned off the mics, Chong talked more about the woman she mentioned in the interview, the woman who had graduated from Furman and who Chong said was like a mother to her. Chong talked more about the very special kindness and generosity of this woman, Lyla Haggard. Lyla passed away in 2016, but in talking about her, Chong was emotional as if the loss of this special woman was still fresh for her. Chong also shared that everywhere her family had lived, God had prepared grandparents for them and for her children. People in the local community who helped fill a role that her family, so far away, could not fill.
The thing that became so clear to me in listening to Chong speak of Lyla Haggard was the power of just one person from the community, one relationship, to change everything for someone. To take a community that is not welcoming and turn it into a place of love and belonging. To reach out and bridge whatever differences may exist with kindness and generosity. It was clear that for at least some of the years Chong has lived in Greenville, Mrs. Lyla Haggard was that one person for her.
As we work to build a more welcoming community, who can each of us be that one person for?
This has been the State of Inclusion Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, the best compliment for our work is your willingness to share the podcast or discuss these ideas with others.
Also feel free to leave us a review or reach out. We love to hear from you and join us for the next episode in this very special series, New Roots, New Voices, Listening to Our Immigrant Neighbors.
CONTRIBUTORS
Guest: Chong Song
Host: Ame Sanders
Social Media and Marketing Coordinator: Kayla Nelson
Sound: Uros Nikolic